The "Goodbye"

Yes, he is gone. But I'm hanging in there. It helps to focus on other things or to remember good times we've had rather than the fact that I won't see his face or hear his voice for two years. So this post is mostly just going to be about the fun stuff we did the week before he left!

Long Beach State Basketball game. Look at all that school spirit I have for his school.

Color Me Mine. Every morning we eat cereal together for breakfast, so we thought it would be a good idea to paint bowls for each other. Some of you may be thinking, what a waste...he won't be able to eat out of it because he's leaving. But that bowl will still be here in 2 short years and most likely he will still enjoy a delicious bowl of cereal then also ...alright?

Long Beach State Dirtbags Baseball Game. It was his last dirtbags game before he left and it was certainly a fun one because we met up with his dad and our friends, Mike and Jay. The game lasted 4 1/2 hours (way too long) and we ended up loosing but Mike got a foul ball and gave it to Miles!

Utah. My family drove up on Thursday and Miles and I flew up on Saturday. They picked us up from the airport and we all went to Salt Lake to hang out for the day. We went shopping at the Gateway mall and walked around Temple Square.

The Roof. Best buffet ever. It's on the top floor of the Joseph Smith Building in Temple Square. It was delicious and so much fun.

Church. We all went to church at his mom's ward where Miles was able to bear his testimony. It was such a sweet testimony and he had us all in tears (all=his mom, my mom, me). His mom and step-dad also got up to bear their testimony. It was such a nice fast and testimony meeting.


Now, comes the sad part.
The Goodbye. The night before we had to say goodbye, we stayed up late and talked about every single emotion we were feeling. What we're excited for, what we're sad about, what we're going to do when we see each other again...etc. We both shed a good amount of tears, but it felt so good to let it out because we've both been trying to be so strong.
The next morning after I was packed and we finished breakfast, he held me on the couch where we said "I love you" to each other about 500 times. Then we heard the inevitable car-door-slam outside and the only thing I could say was, "yuck." My family came in and said their goodbyes to Miles and his family. All of a sudden after my family was back in the car and his family was in the house, we were left alone on the porch and we knew it was time. It would be impossible to put into words what I felt during this time. So so so many emotions were happening to me. But I only let one tear out as we hugged, kissed one last time, and said "I love you, bye."

As I walked away from him, the love of my life, I felt such a feeling of peace come over me. It was almost as if he was still there, holding me. I know that at that moment, the Lord was answering my prayers and the prayers given by others for me.

The MTC. I wanted to be gone before he was set apart so I didn't have to shake his hand goodbye, so I didn't go to the MTC to drop him off. But, his family dropped him off there today and his mom sent me some pictures. How cute does he look in his suit with the name tag and all?

Home. I am actually doing surprisingly well. As long as I keep myself occupied or surrounded by people, I feel so much better. Every once in a while it hurts really bad and I have to grab my heart to keep it from breaking into pieces. But when that happens, I have to remember how amazing it is that my boyfriend is giving two whole years of his life to serve the Lord and how much he will grow in that time. Then when I think about that, I start thinking about MY mission and I get so excited! My papers are done and after my appointment with the Stake President, he will send them to the Brethren! Hopefully I'll leave in June which means I'll get back only three months before Miles! How exciting is that?! That is one of the things that helps me feel better.

I'm so proud of Miles. He is going to be an AMAZING missionary. He is so obedient and hard-working. I know that the Lord has already blessed him in so many ways for choosing to serve a mission. I can't wait to serve also and get home, wait 3 months, and finally be with my boo again!